men affected by rape and sexual abuse

 
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MARS
(Men Affected by Rape and Sexual Abuse)

MARS is a self-help group that meets weekly, for recovery from sexual assault.

Each participant is able to meet their own particular needs at their own pace by making
their own decisions about when to speak, how much to share, speaking of their own
personal experience and using the group for as long as they need. some men have been
attending now for a number of years, while others come for a three month session.
Each participant makes his own decisions about attending.

MARS is assisted by funding from the department of communities, Queensland Government.

MARS assists participants to feel better about themselves, heal their relationships and move on.

Since 1993, 360 men have used the group.

A Message from Dr Wendell Rosevear

TO BE RAPED IS...... TO RECOVER IS......
TO BE OVER POWERED TO BE RE-EMPOWERED
TO BE DENIED CHOICE TO REGAIN CHOICE
TO BE DEGRADED TO BE RESTORED AND HEAL
TO BE TREATED LESS THAN TO BE EQUAL
TO HAVE HONESTY IGNORED TO GAIN RESPECT THROUGH
HONESTY
TO BE USED AND ABUSED TO LOVE AND TRUST








CARING

Often in life we are confronted with the reality that we can't fix, cure, prove or win. However despite this we can still care, share and 'be there' for each other.
Interestingly it is the caring, sharing and understanding that provide the friendships
and fulfillment that give life quality.

Sometimes when we can't fix, cure prove or win we feel like withdrawing from a
situation or a relationship because we feel helpless or vulnerable. I have found 
that if you just 'hang in there' and take the challenge of 'being there' and 'riding the wave together' the results are amazing, even if it is 'a rough ride'.
If we know that someone wants to understand and care and that we are not alone, we can relax and free ourselves from fear and frustration.

Once a good friend came to me crying over the death of her mother, in my desire
to fix her, I said "Don't cry" to which she responded "Wendell, I have to". I was
grateful for her honesty, that let me cry as well. Now I get relief from being able to share and care... a closeness and understanding that is more precious than a magical solution.

The resource of knowing I can be honest, even if it is tears or silence that express it,
produces a strength of friendship that is greater than the fear that I must be strong or
have all the answers when reality tells me that is not being honest anyway.
Anyway being friends is the best part of life
.

(C) 2013